I came out to my family years ago and it wasn’t terrible. They accepted me the same. That is until a few months ago I got a girlfriend. It’s like all of a sudden it became more of a label and now “real.” My family acts weird around her and me. They call us “friends” and are at times disrespectful all while putting on the front of “acceptance.” I know this is a huge change for them and I don’t want to throw it in their face. But I want to be happy too. What would you do? Help!
I’m glad you asked, Anon. Now, I could give you a long drawn out scenario that I would most likely play out if I were in your situation, but there would be no benefit for you. To simply tell you, “Do what you feel is right,” is cliche, I know, but necessary.Ai??There will be many people you meet whom tell you they accept you then act in a manner that is exactly opposite of that acceptance. This is a difficult situation but one you must be prepared for. Sadly, we still live in a world where being gay is a taboo.
What I can tell you is this:
Talk with your family. Let them know that they are hurting you with their choices. The ones that love you should avidly work on recognizing their behaviors as negative. If they don’t, you have done your part. Do not let someone else decide your happiness. Bring your girlfriend around, hold her hand, be completely present to her. Your happiness may be the thing your family needs in order to truly understand who you are. I’m not saying this will be a resolution, but I am saying that there comes a point when you need to decide, “You or me?” Correct the misleading comments your family makes, introduce your girlfriend yourself. You consciously working towards your own happiness is not throwing this change in their face. This is who you are. You are the same person you were yesterday, you simply love differently than they do. That’s it. The end. Nothing scary.
Thank you so much for your question!
If you ever have any questions, feel free to send me a message